


We All Knew This Wouldn't Be Easy

by JinnytheKisaragi (laquilasse)



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: All brother interactions are platonic, Angst, Big Brother Sans, Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Love, Cinnamon Roll Papyrus, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Sans, Protective Undyne, Toriel is a good mom to everyone, Worried Sans, she worries so much abt the tol yet smol skeleton, skelebros
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-03
Updated: 2016-06-24
Packaged: 2018-06-06 03:27:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6736186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laquilasse/pseuds/JinnytheKisaragi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Integrating monsters into life on the Surface is hard.</p><p>Papyrus, Sans thinks in despair as he sits by his baby brother's still form, did not deserve this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It's Been Three Days

**Author's Note:**

> I started to write self indulgent Pap whump and it turned into more
> 
> If you want to chat about anything here's my [tumblr](http://jinny-thekisaragi.tumblr.com/), I'm totally up for convos!

_“…wak…up?”_

 Oh… why did his skull feel like it was filled with cotton? Why couldn’t he see anything? Where was he? He tried desperately to open his eyes, but his lids were so heavy. He was caught in an incredibly disconcerting feeling of drifting in blackness.

  _“You… right…b…fine, swe…eart.”_

 He tried to lift his head towards the muffled voice. Nevermind, not filled with cotton. Filled with water and lead and _why did his head hurt and his whole body now that he thought about it oh god everything hurts oh stars oh goodness why why_  

  _“…oh, …yrus… don… orry.”_

 The voice again, feminine and soft and caring. A careful brush against his cheekbone. He desperately wanted his head to stop throbbing so terribly, and to stop feeling hot yet cold and sweating yet chilled all at the same time. Although it was muffled, the voice and touch were so sweet and calming that he thought, maybe, it could take the pain away, could pull him out of this void. The lead was still there and weighing down his head, and his whole body still hurt and burned and rattled with the force of his quivering and… was someone crying?

  _“…yrus? pap!”_

_“Nurse… ould be… soon.”_

 As awareness began to slowly grip Papyrus, the water began to drain just a little from his skull, and he could now identify a shift in the room’s magical charge as well as a second voice; much deeper than the first, yet still gentle and so blessedly familiar that it made his soul ache for the safety it promised. The pain was getting so much worse, dear _lord_ it felt like every single one of his bones had shattered yet he failed to turn to dust. What _happened_ to him?

 “ _shhhh… shhhh… pap,”_

 That was the second voice again, accompanied by something on his forehead stroking soothingly, a soft grating against his skull that he immediately latched onto and grounded himself with. This strange world of only sound was so terrifying, and the touch was more than welcome.

  _“…sorry… i… so...orry… didn’t wan… eave you… shhhh...”_

 The second voice and the light touch against his skull were joined by soft, warm magic, and Papyrus was soon pulled back into blissful slumber.

 

* * *

 

Toriel’s purple healing magic washed over Papyrus, and she saw Sans let out a shaky breath from the other side of the bed. Little by little, Papyrus’ unconscious pain filled sobs choked off into little whimpers and moans, until finally he was soothed back to sleep by the former Queen’s healing magic and Sans’ gentle shushing and cooing.

 Papyrus looked like a mummy. Toriel was sure there were more bandages than bones under those green hospital sheets, and she couldn’t even see more than half of it. The entire upper half of his skull, including his left eye socket, had been treated and wrapped, and his left arm was in a cast. Each of his fractured ribs had been individually wrapped with utmost care.

 They had come so close, so _so_ close, to losing Papyrus. A few more minutes literally would have killed him. His earlier cries had tugged at every motherly instinct she had, and it frustrated her to no end that she wasn’t permitted to interfere with the doctor’s own treatment plan, which included the copious amounts of green healing magic infused gel beneath the gauze. She hoped this small contribution to take away a bit of his pain wouldn’t be too much of a problem. It was only temporary, after all, just enough to last until the nurse would come.

 She ceased the flow of her magic with a gentle caress to his forehead before rounding the bed, dropping one caring, fluffy paw onto Sans’ shoulder. He slumped forward slightly under her touch and squeezed Papyrus’ uninjured hand. He was so emotionally drained from the past three days, and it showed.

 “My friend," she said kindly, "he will be alright. I have known Dr Swysh for a long time, and believe me, she is putting everything she has into his recovery.”  

 He sighed, using his sleeve to fussily wipe the tears that stubbornly lingered on Papyrus’ now lax face, "yeah, i know. you've been telling me that for three days," he mumbled.

 Toriel’s gaze moved to the magic monitor that now beeped at a much healthier rate than it had previous to Papyrus’ awakening. “He _is_ getting better, Sans. Have faith. Your brother is stubbornly strong. I have no doubt that he will return to us.”

 Sans was silent a moment. “i just… wish i could help him, y’know? he’s hurting so bad, tori…” he trailed off, voice cracking under the strain of everything he was feeling. He was so tired, but put any notion of sleep aside. Papyrus _needed_ him, and if there was ever a driving force to get him to do anything, it was that.

“You are helping him just by being here,” she assured him firmly, “Even if he’s not awake, he recognizes you, does he not? As soon as you spoke to him, he knew it was you. He will come back, and he will be delighted to see you when he does.”

 She gave Sans' shoulder one final squeeze before leaving the room to find her child. It had been three horribly tense days since Papyrus had been rushed in and rescued from death’s door, and Sans had practically chained himself to his brother's side. He didn't sleep, only nibbled at what Toriel brought him from the cafeteria, and snapped at anyone who tried to suggest he take some rest (herself included, although he had apologized immediately afterward. Toriel didn’t have the heart to hold it against him). She had never seen either of the brothers like this. It hurt her soul deeply to see Papyrus so lifeless and Sans so emotionally burdened, and she feared that, should Papyrus somehow not recover, Sans wouldn’t either.

 Not that Toriel could blame him; she was doing her fair share worrying as well. She loved Papyrus ever so dearly, and a crucial part of her patchwork family unit would be missing if he were no longer in it. However, as much as her soul prompted her to put all her energy into worrying about the young skeleton, Sans was doing that enough for ten monsters with no regard for himself. She dared not suggest he try and sleep again, though: The first time she had managed to convince him to rest a few hours ago, he had only reluctantly agreed because it didn’t look like his brother was waking up anytime soon, and, well… that couldn’t have been worse timing. Thankfully, the nurse would soon be in their room to give the poor dear some medication. She just hoped that whatever comments they might have about Sans’ condition would be kept to themselves, for their own good.

 Toriel rounded the corner, having followed the sound of sniffling to a short, empty hallway of the hospital.

 “Frisk?”

 Frisk looked up from where they were crouched behind a chair and flung themselves into their mother’s arms. She picked them up and stroked their hair, enveloping them in warm comfort as they trembled and tried to suppress their sobs.

 “Oh, my child,” she whispered, “what are you doing here?”

 Frisk just shook their head, burrowing closer to Toriel as she took them back to the room. They had been sitting with Toriel by Papyrus’ beside, but fled after Sans had burst in, and Toriel had been too preoccupied with trying to ease Papyrus’ pain to be able to go after them. She knew Frisk blamed themselves, what with being the Ambassador, for not being able to prevent this. She knew how much it hurt them to see Papyrus in such a state.

 A loud banging noise that sounded like a door being kicked open resounded through the hospital, followed by the overwhelming volume of a familiar, authoritative voice, and Toriel froze in her tracks.

 Undyne and Alphys weren’t supposed to be back for at _least_ another week.

 And yet, the hospital was being subjected to the righteous fury of the ex-captain, and there was another layer of complexity to this whole mess.

 “WHERE IS HE?!” Undyne demanded, and Toriel swore she could _hear_ the fish woman’s looming posture and piercing gaze. After a brief moment, her footsteps marched in the direction of Papyrus’ room. Toriel guessed that the poor receptionist, a small mouse monster who probably recognized Undyne and knew who she was talking about, had given her directions.

 The former Queen sighed heavily and picked up her pace until she was almost running. She certainly had her work cut out for her; Frisk needed to see that the guilt resided not with them, Sans needed to sleep, Undyne needed somewhere to redirect her anger, and Toriel needed to stop her before she could make anything worse.

They _all_ needed Papyrus to get better.


	2. Sans Could Not Deal With This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans manages to hold in his rage for the sake of one that he loves. Undyne, however...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So google docs is a lovely thing? The only reason this is done so soon is because I can access google docs from my phone. Bless.
> 
> If you want to chat about anything here's my [tumblr](http://jinny-thekisaragi.tumblr.com/), I'm totally up for convos!

 Toriel left the room to find Frisk, and Sans let his sockets fall on Papyrus’ hand, still clasped in both of his own as gingerly as he would a baby bird fallen from its nest. An unholy mix of helplessness and crippling anxiety had taken hold of his stomach. Its sharp claws relentlessly gripped his insides, and his bones rattled faintly as he tried to keep his jitters in check. The younger skeleton was hurting so badly and Sans couldn't do jack _shit_ about it. He stroked across Papyrus’ knuckles with his thumb, gently, soothingly, letting his magic wrap his little brother in a protective embrace that he hoped would provide a bit of comfort in its familiarity.

 He could not deal with this.

 He felt sick with rage and grief, the thought of anybody wanting to hurt one so sweet as his brother making his heart ache.

 An alleyway, a _goddamn alleyway._ They were just going to leave him there to slowly crumble into dust, alone and scared and helpless. Sans’ fingers twitched as his magic sparked angrily. He didn’t need to stand as The Judge and examine their souls to know that they did not deserve to live. They hurt his brother. They _hurt his brother_ , his little brother who was so genuine, so lovely to every person he encountered; the sunshine of his life and the lives of everyone who knew him.

 He hadn't fought back, that much the short skeleton didn't doubt. Papyrus could never find it in himself to seriously injure, let alone kill, another living being, and Sans could never find it in himself to fault him for that (even though it used to frustrate him to no end when a smaller Papyrus would come home from school hiding what bullies may have done). He was sure it didn't help that Papyrus hadn't wanted to hurt the still fairly fresh relations between humans and monsters, ruining all the hard work that his favourite human had put into making Surface life work for them. 

 But just the _idea_ of his little brother trembling, sobbing in agony and helplessness on the cold wet concrete… It was enough for Sans to want to bawl his eyes out, grab those horrid creatures by the souls and rabidly scrape each and every one of their faces across the street like cheese on a grater _like they deserve those fuckingwretchedhorridD I R T Y B R O T H E R K I L—_

 He could not deal with this. 

 The younger skeleton whimpered softly, brow furrowed as he picked up on the negative change in the magic that surrounded him, and the small keen that Papyrus emitted had Sans snapping sharply back into the present. His heart broke all over again when Papyrus choked and stirred in obvious distress.

_oh, pap..._

 He pushed all unnecessary thoughts aside. The one thing he could do for Papyrus right now was provide a safe atmosphere, and he wasn’t about to let the humans responsible win this battle too. He began to whisper to his brother softly, continuing his earlier soothing motions.

“shhhh paps, i’m so sorry… i’m here, i’m here,”

 Papyrus continued to make small pained sounds (Sans never ever wanted those sounds to come out of Papyrus again, ever), and he mentally flipped the bird at hospital rules as he got onto the bed to sit up against the headboard by his brother. He waited a moment, not wanting to jostle his injuries, and placed a hand on Papyrus’ clavicle and curled an arm around his head, ever so gently cradling him a hair closer to his lap. His little brother turned his head towards him slightly, and Sans caressed the top of his skull.

 “it’s me, pap. it’s ok, everything’s ok,” he cooed reassuringly. Papyrus’ breath hitched, tilting his head towards his brother’s whispered voice. Sans thumbed soothingly along his brow bone to ease the tension there as he fell back into the comfortable and well practiced role. Papyrus needed him right now, needed his big brother to make everything right again just like when they were little, and Sans’ soul twisted with an urgency to do just that.

 Slowly, the younger skeleton calmed down, unconsciously nuzzling closer to Sans’ leg. “that’s it kiddo,” he smiled affectionately, “I gotcha, shhhh, it's ok now, it’s ok...” Papyrus was pressed fully up against his brother now, and Sans continued to murmur with his gentle ministrations.

 

* * *

 

Not long after he fell asleep (or was it long? He couldn't tell), he was awoken again by the absence of the calming presence he had been latching onto.

 Papyrus panicked. He was lost again, lost in this horrible dark world, deserted by the one light he had, lost with no way out of the stifling nothingness. It was so expansive yet left him gasping for breath, unable to move or see, body taut with pain. It was terrifying.

 The pain, oh god. It began to grow again after he woke up, and the young skeleton felt so terribly helpless. He wanted to cry. He wanted to give up. He wanted desperately someone to save him.

  _“it’s me… ap… ok… ev… ok…”_

 The voice! It came back! He could hear it again, feel the presence of the cyan magic (cyan? Odd, he couldn't see anything…) and the soothing touch surround him again. He almost cried in relief.

  _it’s me_

 The one full statement he had been able to distinguish through the cotton.

  _it’s me_

  ** _it’s me_**

 …

  _Sans!_

 Memories of who he was outside the blackness began to come back. Oh, how he now longed for the familiar comfort of his older brother, to bury himself in that dirty blue hoodie, protected, in faith that Sans would take care of everything. Was his brother in this void with him? Or was he outside of it, trying to lead Papyrus out?

 He tried to move closer to Sans, unsure if he succeeded until he brushed up against a hard surface.

  _“...got… shhhh… ok… ok…”_

 He didn't know what was going on, but the voice that surely belonged to his brother was whispering so soothingly to him, the hand on his skull so gentle. He felt safe, able deny the pull of sleep no longer, despite any lingering pain.

 

* * *

 

 “You never were one for following the rules, huh?”

 The voice from the door startled Sans, and he instinctively steeled his grip on his brother. When he turned around, however, he could have died of relief.

 “becky?”

 Becky, a light hazelnut coloured bunny monster, stood in the doorway. She had lived close to the brothers in Snowdin with her sisters, Bonnie and Brandy, who ran the inn and the local shop. She was quite adept with healing magic and was always happy to lend a hand to anyone who needed it (she was quite familiar with Papyrus after frequently healing any injuries due to his over exuberance). The last Sans had heard, she decided to pursue nursing and had continued her studies on the Surface. He would have been overjoyed to see her again if not for the circumstances.

 “Heya Sans,” she greeted quietly, kindly, as she strode towards the bed. A bag was slung over her shoulder and she carried a syringe filled with green liquid, approaching the same side of Papyrus that Sans sat on. Becky made no indication that she was going to make him adhere to hospital rules, and for that, he was grateful.

 “Arm,” she said, and Sans carefully lifted his brother’s good arm to give her access to the radius bone. Unfortunately, skeletons required a fair deal more force when it came to injections, and Sans couldn't help but wince and rub Papyrus’ shoulder sympathetically as he watched it go in with a sharp jerk from the bunny before she depressed the plunger. Sufficiently drugged, all left over tension from Papyrus’ body fled, and he sank fully into the pillows to sleep peacefully with his temple resting against Sans’ femur.

 The older skeleton brushed his hand lightly against the side of Papyrus’ skull, satisfied. “haven’t seen you in quite a while,” he spoke suddenly, looking up at Becky, “what’s up? school, I'm guessing?”

 “Yep,” she grinned, “I’m in the final year of my nursing program. We spend a lot of hours doing hands on training.” The bunny slipped the syringe into her pocket and crossed her arms, leaning against the bed frame.

 Sans nodded. He’d had a few classmates with friends in nursing programs when he had gone for his doctorates, and had a general idea of what it looked like. Still, it was nice to hear from her about different jobs she did at the hospital.

 “Oh, you know,” she waved a paw dismissively, “injections, fluffing pillows, bringing blankets…” She threw a side eye at Sans. “...telling the families of patients to get some rest because wearing themselves out doesn't help anyone,” Becky shrugged, “Basic stuff.”

 Sans glared at her, but she was unaffected. Instead, she rounded the bed and happily opened the bag she had been carrying. The bunny began to unfold a black cot, as well as pulling out an extra pillow and fleece throw.

 “Silly boy, I knew you wouldn't want to leave him,” she smiled, “Take a rest on that. You’ll wake up if he does, and you can get some sleep. I’m sure the other nurses will turn a blind eye.” The bunny’s smile faltered a touch, and she turned to leave.

 He stared at her retreating back, perplexed.

 “becky?”

 “Yeah, Sans.”

 “Thanks a million.”

 She nodded, already leaving again. Sans hadn't noticed, but she looked drained now that she wasn't smiling.

 “becky?”

 The nurse simply turned and looked at him from the doorway this time.

 “Why have the other nurses been just letting me break hospital rules like this?”

 She was silent a moment. “They're all feeling a bit more sympathetic than usual, I think.” Becky scratched at her elbow; a nervous habit. “I mean, they're always sensitive towards the feelings of all the patients and families, it’s just that another young monster was brought in here around five days ago… under very similar circumstances to your brother. The only difference is that she didn't last the night.”

 Similar circumstances. Another victim of the same people, he was sure, and his rage returned for a moment. He stamped it out quickly, not wanting to cause Papyrus any undue discomfort. Becky had given him the painkillers, so really, he would have been too far into sleep to sense the change, but Sans would be damned before he put Papyrus at risk.

 “is the family ok?” He knew the answer to that.

 Becky shook her head and sniffed surreptitiously. “It’s been, um, pretty hard on everyone involved, y’know?”

 The room fell into silence for a long stretch as both monsters retreated into their own thoughts. It was Becky who broke the hush.

 “He’s going to wake up soon, probably in the next day or so,” she said, “You take good care of him, alright?”

 Sans chose to ignore the way her voice quivered slightly. He simply nodded, swallowing, and the bunny left the room.

  _Didn't last the night._ That poor girl, her poor family… Becky said had been young, she could have been just a child. That family had just lost a _child,_ and in the most horrible way. Sans’ stomach dropped in empathy, and he pressed his sleeping charge to himself as tightly as he dared. That could have been Papyrus; he had been one slip and a minute away from dusting, his brother’s fortitude being the only thing that kept him alive. Sans still felt sick thinking about it. God… what would he even have _done_?

  _A bright red scarf in the snow that cradled Papyrus just like it had when he was a little babybones._

 Unbidden images flashed across his mind, and he squeezed his eyes shut against the scene of the very first run.

  _Kneeling on the cold Snowdin ground, rocking and wailing and clutching the bundled fabric that held what was left of his dear baby brother, heart shattered beyond all repair._

 A fate worse than death.

  _Simply wanting so badly to die because why why why did this happen to Papyrus, god, the last person it should have been was Papyrus, it should have been him, should have been anyone else, just not his young, sweet brother._

 Stop thinking about it stop thinking about it stop thinking about i—

 “WHERE IS HE?!”

 Sans jumped, breathing heavily, shakily, and so _so_ grateful to whatever that was for getting him out of his head. Heavy footfalls stomped towards the room, and the short skeleton’s eyes widened slightly as understanding dawned on him.

  _Shit_ . There was only one person he knew with that quality of booming authority to both their voice and their footsteps. He had texted her after the first day, not only because she was Papyrus’ best friend, but also because she would have ripped out his spine if he hadn't. Part of him approved that she would drop everything and anything for his brother just as he would, and another part of him _so_ wasn't ready to deal with all her (no doubt furious) questioning.

 The footsteps were right outside the door, however, and Sans mentally steeled himself.

 

* * *

 

 This situation was going downhill about as fast as he thought it would.

 One look at Papyrus made Undyne go still as a statue, unable to do more than stare in shock at the sight of her best friend swathed in bandages. Rage soon began to bleed freely out of her every pore. An energy spear materialized in her hand. Her knuckles turned white with the force in which she balled her fists. Sans could have sworn the temperature in the room dropped a little.

 “What. The _fuck_. Happened.” She hissed, audibly grinding and clacking her teeth with each word. Her voice and body quivered with barely bridled violent anger, an atom bomb waiting to be dropped.

 Sans supposed that his choices were to either painfully explain or painfully be ripped to shreds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I'm sorry, I'm withholding Undyne from you AGAIN, but here's a little snippet to tide you over:
> 
>  
> 
> _“I’ll kill them.”_
> 
>  
> 
> _“U-Undy–”_
> 
>  
> 
> _“Who did this, Sans? Who?!” she demanded sharply, teeth bared, “I’ll fucking kill them. I’ll skin them alive. I’ll strangle them with their own god damn entrails.”_
> 
>  
> 
> Ooooooo she piiiiiiissed


	3. What Can You See On The Horizon?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the way to break the most stubborn of warriors is the go for the heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hooooooly crap. Writing is hard. And time consuming. Have this before I head to rehearsal.

It hadn’t taken long at all for all the pieces to come together; Papyrus injuries were obviously done purposefully, and Sans’ exhaustion was damn near palpable. Cruel realization of the events that must have lead up to this point dawned on her. She straightened up almost imperceptibly, and while Undyne had had hardly moved, the change in her demeanor and aura was unmistakable: where a devastated and shocked friend stood moments before, a determined, stone cold Captain stood in her place.

When Sans had texted her nothing more than _‘pap is hurt. come to the hospital as soon as you can.’_ and refused to answer any of the 35 responses she fired back, she and Alphys had immediately abandoned their beach town tour and booked it back home, making a three day trip in two. As she drove like a madwoman and gripped the steering with white knuckles, Undyne had fervently hoped to whatever god was up there that she was overreacting. She had hoped to get to the hospital, worried out of her mind, only to find Papyrus’ smiling face greeting her from a hospital bed, roughed up a bit from an accident. She had hoped that Sans was being a protective big brother as he was wont to do. She had hoped to breathe a sigh of relief and noogie her skeletal friend for making her worry.

This, though… This was the stuff of her nightmares, and it was _certainly_ no accident. Somone did this to him. Someone did this to her Pap. Someone made him so quiet, so lifeless, and if monsters didn't turn to dust she would have surely thought him dea _–_

She inhaled sharply and narrowed her eyes, pushing away the unimaginable.

“I’ll kill them.”

Alphys put a clawed hand on her girlfriend’s arm. “U-Undy–”

“Who did this, Sans? Who?!” she ground out, teeth bared, “I’ll fucking _kill_ them. I’ll skin them alive. I’ll strangle them with their own god damn entrails.” Her voice had dropped to a low, deadly tone.

Sans’ face looked like a strange mix of wanting to kill someone and wanting to curl up in a ball and give up. “four men.”

“...four men.”

“yeah.”

She crossed her arms, spear still in hand, and tapped her nails on her teeth. Her brow was furrowed. “Do you remember what they looked like? Any distinguishable features? What part of town were you in?” She inhaled sharply and her pupil contracted. “Were they humans?”

Defeat was written across his features. “i don’t know.”

“You _don’t know?!_ How can you see someone and not be able to tell if they’re a monster or a human?! You were a fucking sentry! What do you mean _you_ _don’t know?!”_

“well, usually when someone says they don’t know something, it means that they have little to no knowledge pertaining to the subject at hand, no matter how much they wish they did.”

“Don’t get smart with me,” she jabbed the spear in his direction, “We’re not on different sides here, numbskull!”

The fish woman had a lot more to say and even more to yell, but never got the chance to as she was cut off by a third voice.

“Undyne, that is quite enough.”

Three heads turned towards the door to see Toriel stride in. She held Frisk, who had somewhat detached their face from her shoulder, but was still a little red-eyed from earlier. Frisk wiggled a little, prompting Toriel put them down as she came to the center of the room, and darted over to Sans to climb into his lap. Sans wrapped his free hand around their waist as they settled there, looking extremely grateful that Toriel had come to his rescue. The child now held Papyrus’ hand in their small, delicate ones, petting it softly. He remained completely limp.

The fish woman muttered to herself as Toriel advanced towards the group, but nodded her head slightly in respect all the same.

“Your Majesty,” she greeted, energy spear dematerializing as she remembered her manners. A gentle, fluffy paw came to rest on her shoulder, and she glanced up to see the Queen looking upon her sympathetically.

“Would you care to take a walk with me a moment?” Toriel said kindly, tone switching seamlessly from regal queen to something softer.

Undyne scoffed disbelievingly. “All due respect, but I’m not exactly up for an _outing_ just now. I just want to know why the hell my best friend is lying there half dead!”

“Of course, dear,” the ex-Queen agreed calmly, noting the sickly look that Sans began sporting at Undyne's description of his brother, “which is why I would like you to come with me.” She took Undyne’s hand, one paw remaining on her shoulder while the other lead her along, giving her plenty of time to pull away if she so wished. “It will be but a moment, as I said. Just a walk around the garden and I can get you up to speed, alright? Alphys, you too please.”

Unlike her girlfriend, the lizard hastily agreed, desperate to get away from the awkward tension in the room. Sans looked equally grateful. Undyne still wanted to start yelling, demanding to know who was responsible for this, but the sight of her unconscious friend doused the fire with the helplessness it drenched her in. She eventually let herself be pulled along, fully aware of how uncharacteristic it was of her, and Sans and Frisk were soon alone in the room with the steady beeping of Papyrus’ magic monitor.

 

* * *

 

 

As promised, Toriel took the girls on a stroll through the gardens outside the hospital. Undyne watched the different colours go by as she walked between her girlfriend and her Queen. A small smile tickled the corners of her mouth when she remembered how excited Papyrus had been to see all of the different plants that could grow on the Surface, due to the presence of actual sunlight.

_“Oh my god, Undyne, LOOK! Who knew flowers came in colours besides blue and yellow?!”_

_“Wait, food grows on these ones?!”_

_“THERE’S SO MUCH GREEN EVERYWHERE I’M SO HAPPY”_

The smile faded quickly when they walked through a patch of flowers that were familiar shade of bright red, and she tore her eyes away, crossing her arms.

“So,” Toriel started, breaking the silence. “How was your trip?”

Undyne kicked a rock and didn’t answer.

Alphys’ stuttering voice picked up for her girlfriend. “I-it was n-nice. While it l-lasted, of co-course.” Her hands flew up to her mouth, “Oh my god. I d-d-didn’t mean to imply–what I m-mean is–c-coming back wasn’t–”

“It is alright, dear,” Toriel smiled, “I understand what you meant.”

Alphys fell silent again, claws clicking together nervously. The group walked slowly along the path, a winding trail of pale cobblestone that acted as a backdrop for the lush colours of the garden. The foliage above was thick; tall, green trees that blocked the harsh sunlight which would have dried out scales of any aquatic monster quite quickly. Warm wind combatted the coolness of the shade, gently combing through Undyne’s hair and Toriel’s fur. It was pretty nice, actually, and Undyne found she was exceedingly grateful that they’d had the means and opportunity to build a monster-run care establishment on the Surface. Due to being a smaller facility, the hospital was highly efficient and quite well kept. She wondered if Papyrus would have gotten the help he needed if it weren’t for this place.

 _Papyrus._ She couldn’t wait any longer. “Well?” Undyne said, a hint of impatience bleeding through her tone. “What happened?”

Toriel breathed out through her nose slowly. “To tell you the truth, I am not exactly sure.”

“You know, I’m getting real tired of that answer.”

“I was not there. I do not know what happened.” Toriel said firmly. Usually she would be somewhat offended by a tone such as that, but she also knew that tensions were high right now, and that Undyne only spoke out of desperation for someone she loved. Toriel had too much sympathy for the ex-Captain at the moment to hold it against her. “Sans is the one that found Papyrus in that state, and he has barely spoken to anyone about anything since then, let alone discussed the events that brought us here. He could not tell me anything the paramedics did not already know, so I did not push what was not explicitly urgent.”

Undyne clenched her jaw. “Not urgent?! So, what, no nurses questioning how Pap got his injuries? He hasn’t had to make a police report? He’s just been sitting there for days, not talking to anyone?!” Toriel responded with a sigh and Undyne snarled. “Ugh, that is so _like_ him! He never tells anyone anything! Even when he was a goddamn sentry, it was still like cracking a code to get any kind of information from him. You basically have to shove your hand down his throat and pull the answers out if you want them!”

Alphys trotted forward to keep up with Undyne’s annoyed pace. “I-it’s true. I’ve known Sans f-for a long t-time, and, um, I n-never even knew he h-had studied D-Determination unt-til y-years later. A-and that w-was only b-be-because I bribed him to t-tell me. While h-he was drunk.”

“Yes, I know,” Toriel huffed, recalling many times in which the more mysterious aspects of Sans’ personality had gotten on her nerves, “But you cannot expect it to come easy to him, either. Sans is evasive and secretive at the best of times, and now he has experienced something that _anyone_ would internalize. We need to give him space and we need to give him time to come to terms with what happened. I informed the doctor that it had been traumatic, so none of the staff have tried to probe information from him.”

Undyne straightened up and looked at Toriel. “Well _I’m_ not afraid of probing,” she said, prompting the ex-Queen expectantly.

“Right, yes… Well, I will start with my side of the story, and then I can tell you other small bits I have managed to gather from Sans,” she began, slowing their pace a fraction so Alphys didn’t have to work so hard to walk with them, “The actual incident happened on Wednesday: I was at the supermarket with Frisk, and Sans was at home. I thought Papyrus was as well, but around four o’clock, Sans called my cell phone, wanting to know if his brother was with me. Of course, he was not, and I thought that maybe he had stopped by somewhere on his way home from his shift at the restaurant, but Sans seemed to be quite worried that something else had happened. He said that he had phoned Papyrus and gotten his voicemail, which, as both of you know, is near unheard of.” She saw Undyne clench her fists out of the corner of her eye, “However, within a few minutes of the call, his second line started ringing. He said it was Papyrus and hung up, so I saw no cause to further pursue the issue.”

“Wait, wait, how did he call Sans?” Undyne interjected, “If he didn’t pick up his phone first, the attack would have already happened.”

Toriel grimaced. “Yet another thing I wish I could tell you. I thought the entire situation was fine and dealt with, but Sans called me again about an hour later, and I hardly even recognized his voice he was so distraught. He didn’t tell me anything over the phone, just begged me to come to the hospital as soon as I could, so Frisk and I drove here immediately.” She shook her head slightly, remembering the sight of Sans, practically vibrating with anxious tension as he sat in the waiting room with dim sockets staring at nothing, pleading with the staff every chance he got for an update on his brother. “He told me he found Papyrus in the alley just outside the restaurant, and didn’t call me sooner because he had been on the line with Papyrus as he searched.”

Undyne stared intensely at nothing, chewing at the new information in her mind while she continued to follow Toriel and Alphys through the garden. She could faintly hear Toriel answering a question that Alphys’ had about the events they had both just learned about, but the cogs in her mind were spinning and their conversation fell into the background. Papyrus had been able to survive. But at what cost? What had her best friend had to go through that he was now going to remember forever? Oh god, had Papyrus just lain there, waiting for death? One thought spiralled into the next, and Undyne was sent back down into the darkest reaches of Waterfall, to a point when she had been little more than a guppy. She gnawed on her cheek, drawing small pinpricks of blood. She didn’t care.

_Her mother told her countless times, ‘Undyne, don’t go near the southern waterfall. It’s dangerous for such a little fish. You could slip and fall down the cliff.’ So of course Undyne, being Undyne, most certainly went near the southern waterfall every chance she got. As one could predict, her mother’s words one day did come to pass, and Undyne plummeted to the darkness below, screaming as she went. Thankfully, she had hit a few jutted out rocks on the way down that had actually slowed her fall, and her then tiny body landed with a thud in the tall grass growing at the bottom. It had hurt like a bitch, that was for sure, but she had been, somehow, alive. Arms and legs sprawled in all directions, Undyne just stared back up to where she fell, amazed and incredibly grateful that she had survived. It was a moment of bliss before the pain caught up with her, and she felt every reason why her mother warned her to avoid this place._

_It was absolutely excruciating. She remembered it clear as crystal. She couldn’t move, couldn’t even breathe. Dark spots danced before her eyes as the world spun around her. She had lain there for what felt like hours, gasping and gulping desperately for breath as tears rolled down her scuffed up cheeks, all fronts of toughness disappearing._

_The pain, however, hadn’t been the worst part. No, Undyne’s panic multiplied tenfold when she realized that there hadn’t been sight nor sound of another living being since she had fallen. There was no one. No one here but her and the river and the silence, God, such oppressive and crushing silence. It gripped her head with strong hands, relentlessly forcing her to contemplate the pressing matter of her own mortality. Her young mind had known of death, of course, but having it so plainly presented in front of her face… it had been a lot to comprehend. She was never going to see her family or friends again, the Silence told her. She was never going to be part of the Royal Guard like she dreamed, the Silence mocked. It whispered that she was going to disappear, her dust mingling with the tall grass and the sand, and no one would be there even to say goodbye to her. She tried to ignore the ripples of agony coursing through her body so she could get up or at least cry for help, if only to shut the Silence up, and failed miserably. Despite incredible amounts perseverance and stubborn will to live that not many children at her age possessed, Undyne’s Hope had begun to fade as she was forced to listen to the Silence’s continued lament of false sympathy, any chance of rescue fleeting with every passing second._

And though her salvation had eventually come with a quiet _‘tra la la. Even the most stubborn of fish must learn to swim in calm waters before facing rapids’_ and brought her back to her distraught mother and father, she would never forget how terrified she had been. Even years later as she took her place as Captain, revered by all as a stone hard wall of passion and fighting spirit, she still felt impossibly small when memories of that day crept into her nightmares, though they were few and far between.

For Papyrus to have called Sans at that point meant that it had been one final cry for help. It meant that Papyrus had been lying there in agony for however long, the Silence forcing him to suddenly face that he would very likely die, and there was little to nothing he could do about it. Her friend, _her_ _best friend_ who deserved nothing but happiness and love, had felt just as helpless, just as horribly, painfully alone and desperate as she had that day. There were very few people Undyne would wish that feeling on, and for Papyrus to feel it… It _burned_ her, it burned and ached on a soul deep level.

And she hadn't been there to help him.

“He must’ve…” she swallowed. “...must’ve been able to stay conscious, despite all his injuries.”

“And thank God for that,” Toriel said as she slowed their pace. They came to rest in the center of the garden; a small courtyard with a gazebo that created a unique sense of serenity, “He is alive because it. If Sans had not been talking to him as he searched, Papyrus may have lost too much Hope.”

Sans… jeez, she should have been easier on him, she reprimanded herself. He really hadn’t known anything about the attackers. It was because of him that Papyrus had lived.

“I spoke to a few of the other nurses,” Toriel continued, breaking Undyne out of her thoughts, “I do not know if Sans is aware of what I am about to tell you, however I think you should know for reasons pertaining to law enforcement: Papyrus wasn’t the only victim here.”

Undyne simply stared at her.

“Another young monster was brought here less than a week ago. We don’t know if they were the same attackers, but she also sustained many blunt force injuries.” Toriel took a breath and held it, trying to block out images of children she had known and loved that had long since departed. “She died in hospital earlier this week. I contacted the family and I will be visiting them in a few days to offer my condolences.”

The three women stood in silence for a good while, the rustling of the foliage around them the only sound besides their own thoughts. Undyne, for her part, was absolutely devastated. It’s not that she wasn’t used to bad things happening to good people; the whole reason she had joined the Guard was to prevent that from happening. But she _hadn’t done that._ In Undyne’s mind, she had failed as a protector and as the Captain.

She felt a scaly hand take her own. “U-Undyne, d-don’t beat yo-yourself up,” Alphys said, prompting her girlfriend to look at her, “I-it’s not your fault! You d-didn’t do this.”

“Just because I wasn’t the one who attacked them doesn’t make me innocent. The Royal Guard’s duty is to keep monsters safe, and that _certainly_ didn’t happen.”

“You c-couldn’t have done a-anything!” Undyne shook her head and freed her arm from Alphys’ grasp.

“Protecting monsters is my _job,_ Alph,” She choked, fins drooping, “It’s what I _do_. I should never have disbanded the Guard, I should have taken better precautions to ensure that things like this wouldn’t happen, but I didn’t! And now not only is Pap paying for it, but so is that girl and everyone who knew her! Two innocent monsters were attacked, one seriously injured and the other _killed_ , and all because I thought that a few measly years of peace meant we’d be safe here!”

 _This_ was the Surface they'd all dreamed of for so long? This was what they got after being imprisoned for thousands of years? Would it have been a better idea to go with the initial plan of war on the humans? Did shoving a spear up someone’s ass or down their throat hurt more? All quality questions that she didn’t know the answer to (though she’d be more than happy to experiment that last one on whoever did this).

Alphys grabbed her hand again, insistent. “I-I know all ab-bout making mistakes, ok?” She said, “A-and trust m-me, this–this one is n-not on you!”

The ex-Queen took a step forward towards the couple. “Did you, Asgore, and an entire committee of monsters and some humans not discuss this matter?”

She frowned. “That’s not the _point–_ ”

“Isn’t it, though? Taking into consideration your logic, did Asgore not have the final say on this?”

Undyne’s eye widened. “NO! What?! This is _not_ Asgore’s fault!”

“Then how is it yours? You did not make the decision to disband the Royal Guard by yourself. That whole committee deemed the Surface a safe place for monsterkind, not just you.” She said gently. Alphys nodded in approval, and Undyne sighed, grasping her girlfriend’s hand more firmly.

Toriel gave her a knowing look before she began to walk along the path once more. “Well, ladies, let us go back to the room shall we?” She said without turning her back. “Sans and Frisk will be waiting for us, and hopefully, Papyrus won’t be far behind. The nurses have been very good at keeping me well informed of his condition, and one of them told me that his progression suggests that he should be coming back to us soon.”

Undyne perked up at that. The thought of Papyrus, awake and talking and _alive_ spurred the Captain out of her misery and back into action. It wasn’t like her to wallow, and she’d be damned if she was going to start now! She may have still carried the guilt of not preventing this, but she was now determined to do what she could now that it had happened. Diverse strategies and patrol routes popped into her head as she followed Toriel, Alphys not far behind her. The Royal Guard would be reformed; No question about it. The safety of all Surface-dwelling monsters depended on her, and if she could strike up a coworking deal with the local police, even better. Then there was also the matter of investigating exactly _who_ it was. Papyrus had been jumped right outside of his workplace; a risky move for the perpetrators, but they must have known that getting too close to the house would have been riskier, which indicated that this had been planned in advance. Four men, and they knew where Pap worked, _when_ he worked (unless they had waited around until they saw him leave, which was very possible. It was something to note for the investigation). They had left him alive… why had they left him alive? If it was an organized hit, they would have been clean. Either they were trying to send a message, or they were sloppy lunatics that knew how to do their research but failed to complete their second course of action. And if they were humans, which was extremely likely, would they have to face monster law or human law? She hoped it was the former. Monster law stated that, in the event of a dangerous outlaw, the Royal Guard has the duty and responsibility to disable and/or eliminate the threat by whatever means necessary. She could count on two hands all cases of their history in which this had been necessary, but Undyne had no objections to adding this one to that list. She’d have to bring it up to Asgore, of course, and Frisk, though she doubted they would have much of a problem with the Guard trying to catch the murderers.

_“Undyne, please, please don't hurt them…”_

Shit. Of course, of _course_ her mind would conjure up a Papyrus to contradict her murderous thoughts. He knew the law. He knew she had every right and responsibility to kill these maniacs, and he knew that she would, given the chance. She could just see him now; wide, dewy sockets begging for his pacifism to quench the fires of her rage.

_“Just capture them, please! Who does it help if they die? If we retaliate, who knows how bad it will get?”_

Pleading had never worked on her. Many had tried, including Frisk, but to no avail. Once her mind was set, there was not dissuading her. Well… At least she _wished_ it never worked on her, but a certain skeleton had managed to become the exception to many a rule in her life.

_“Death only breeds more death. Someone has to end it.”_

Ugh, she hated that he was right. Especially seeing as it was just her mind’s projection of him. The real one would surely look at least twice more like a wounded puppy.

By the time Undyne’s Mind Papyrus (her “backup conscience”, if you will), finished imploring to her, they had made it back to the front of the hospital. The mouse receptionist’s head popped up when the three of them walked in and promptly shrunk back down at the sight of Undyne. Toriel gave her a kind smile, which made her look a fraction more comfortable before she jumped in her seat.

“Oh! Your Majesty!” She cried in her small voice, “Nurse Becky asked me to tell you that the patient, um, Papyrus, is it? He’s showing increased spikes in cephalized magic activity and is expected to wake up within a few hours, maybe even within the next.”

Undyne didn’t hear whatever pleasantries Toriel had to exchange with the receptionist, despite both women she had been walking with calling after her. It was actually amazing how much she did not care. The one thing she gave a single shit about right now was about to wake up in at least hour, and she had the entire Guard to contact before he did. With her internal clock ticking down from sixty minutes, Undyne strode purposefully down the hallway.

 

* * *

 

“...Thanks, ‘ressa. Yeah, I’ll tell him you said hi… What’s that? Oh... Well, he’s not awake yet, but I’ll be here, so I’ll let you know when you can give it to him, ok? And I’m trying to contact everyone as soon as possible, so I’d like you to get the word out to everyone you can. I haven’t called Doggo yet, but just in case he can’t see his phone again, I’d like you to take a stop by his house. Everyone should be _very_ careful right now, I can’t stress enough how important it is for everyone to travel in groups and be on their guard... Alright, talk to you soon.”

“Hey Doggo, it’s Undyne. I’ve also asked Dogaressa to contact you in person, just in case you lost your phone. Anyways, because of recent events, the Royal Guard is going to be reformed. This is an official call back to duty. Contact me as soon as you can. Thanks.”

“Mettaton, hey, it’s Undyne. Alphys gave me your number. Listen, I– no, I don’t want you to plan our wedding! Would you chill for a second?! I need you to broadcast something. I can’t give you many details right now, but two monsters have been attacked. We think they were hate crimes. I need you to tell everyone to stay safe and be careful. Don’t go out at night, stay in safe parts of town, travel in groups, all that stuff… I don’t know who the first one was, only that she was a young girl and she didn’t survive. Like I said, I can give you more details once we start investigating. No, I know. It’s horrible. Papyrus is going to live, though, thank God… yeah, we had the Christmas party at his house last year.” She grimaced and held the phone a little ways away from her ear when the pitch of Mettaton’s voice increased, asking fervently to be kept in the loop about Papyrus’ condition. “Didn’t know you two were friends, but sure. Just get that message out there, ok? Thanks. Bye.”

“Hey, Asgore. This is, um, this is the third time I’ve called you today, so… I’ll probably swing by your house or something, but something really bad has happened. I need you to call me back, or better yet, come by the hospital.” She almost pressed the red ‘end call’ button, but quickly added, “AND DON’T BRING THAT DAMN FLOWER!”

Undyne hung up the phone with a sigh and slumped forward in the hard plastic chair outside Papyrus’ door. The old king could ignore his phone for days, totally perplexed and apologetic when Undyne annoyedly pulled up to his house. What a fantastic time for him to lose his phone between the couch cushions again.

The door swung open, and a blur of brown fur rushed into the room. She didn’t have time to get up and see what was the matter before she was met with Toriel, Frisk, and Alphys coming out. The lizard came to sit beside her, fidgeting nervously. Toriel, however, held Frisk with a relieved smile on her face to match the one on Frisk’s.

“He’s waking up again. Hopefully he fully returns to consciousness this time,” she told the confused Captain. “We’ll be able to see him once Nurse Becky makes sure he’s alright.”

 

* * *

 

 

Becky and Sans were the only two monsters remaining in the room, as per her instructions. The bunny had come back as soon as Sans hit the call button and ushered everyone but Sans out in order to give Papyrus some space. She was now monitoring the different levels in his magic, keeping an eye on their fluctuation as he regained consciousness, a clipboard in hand and a vial of painkillers ready if needed. Sans had come off his perch beside Papyrus, but he was still stuck to his side like glue, holding his hand and acting as his anchor to consciousness.

Papyrus’ unwrapped eye began to blink blearily, showing minimal to no signs of pain. He stared blankly ahead at the ceiling. His brow furrowed slightly, but his expression was one of confusion rather than pain.

Sans couldn’t help the watery smile that nudged the corners of his mouth. “hey bud,” he said softly as Becky used the remote to adjust the bed more to a sitting position, “how ya feelin’?”

Papyrus’ head jerked towards the voice of his brother. “Sans?” he croaked. His voice was hoarse from not speaking for three days, and Sans found himself wishing that he had some water to give him. Aside from his voice, however, something was… off. Papyrus seemed a little bit tense, and he wasn’t quite looking at Sans, just in his general direction.

“yeah, bro?”

“Am I…” his breathing picked up a little, and while he reached up and scrubbed at his right eye socket, “...am I awake? Am I awake right now or am I dreaming?”

Sans’ smile faded just slightly. “yeah, you’re awake now. but you’ve been sleeping for quite a while, lazybones.”

His breathing steadily increased and he began to squeeze Sans’ hand, while the hand of his broken arm pressed up against his bandaged eye socket as best it could with the cast. It clacked against his skull as he tried to reach it with his fingers, but he refused to release his brother's hand.

Becky looked on the younger skeleton in sympathy. “It’s normal for patients to feel disoriented and confused after they wake up, especially after a traumatic experience,” she said, “How are you feeling, Papyrus?”

The younger skeleton didn’t answer her, instead leaning closer to Sans and shivering slightly.

“ _pap,_ ” Sans said firmly, determined to find and obliterate the source of his little brother’s distress, “what’s wrong?”

Papyrus once again looked towards him, eye socket becoming dewy with desperate and confused tears, and anxiety radiated off him in waves. Becky frowned in contemplation.

“Papyrus,” she said, “it looks like your eyesocket is bugging you, yes?”

The tall skeleton blinked vigorously as he curled in on himself. He didn't answer.

"Sans,” he whimpered so quietly that Sans wasn’t sure he’d heard it or imagined it.

“ok, ok, it’s ok,” Sans patted his hand. He glanced back at Becky, who nodded approvingly and waited for Papyrus’ answer as she jotted something down on her clipboard, “just try to explain what you’re feeling, bro.”

“I…” He rasped, gripping his brother’s hand so tightly Sans feared it might break, “um… sharp?” He coughed, a deep, bone rattling cough, “It feels sharp and… and a little sore, but… I…”

“what, pap?” Sans prompted gently. The room was frozen, and Papyrus let out a shuddering breath.

“I can't see anything.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! First Undertale fic I've written, yet I've read a bunch and finally gotten the courage to write my own. Thank you to all the other amazing authors who have already contributed to this fandom! I love you!
> 
> If you want to chat about anything here's my [tumblr](http://jinny-thekisaragi.tumblr.com/), I'm totally up for convos!


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